20 4 / 2014

lizclimo:

happy easter 

lizclimo:

happy easter 

(via zackisontumblr)

18 4 / 2014

18 4 / 2014

caesaretluna:

spnedit: Angels

the angels, they don't care. I think maybe they just don't have
the equipment to care. seems like when they try, it just breaks
them apart.

[demon version]

(via nosignofwings)

18 4 / 2014

shawnspenstar:

My friend’s dad used to work at a movie theatre where a lot of celebrities came to apparently and one time Tom Hanks came in and he was feeding tickets into the machine and couldn’t see anything so the guy up top was like “dude, that’s Tom Hanks” and her dad was like “yeah right if that’s Tom Hanks I’ll start eating these tickets” and Tom Hanks leans over the counter and whispers “start eating the tickets” 

(via carryingmywaywardinthetardis)

17 4 / 2014

stillpartwhole:

krudman:

the-average-gatsby:

thanks joffrey

What a great message. I wish all characters were this nice. Does anyone know what this is from?

Game of Thrones. A very happy series with a wide range of cast members and it’s just a positive series

(via destiel-sherlocked-the-tardis)

17 4 / 2014

17 4 / 2014

Chuck + quotes

(Source: belaying, via tellusaboutrupertgraves)

17 4 / 2014

fuck-benedict-cumberbatch:

i was emailing my fucking math teacher and he asked me a series of questions and he literally jsut

i love teachers

15 4 / 2014

sk-raveness:

drucila616:

How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces?These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?WITNESS: My name is Susan!_______________________________ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?WITNESS: No, I just lie there.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?WITNESS: July 18th.ATTORNEY: What year?WITNESS: Every year._____________________________________ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?WITNESS: Forty-five years._________________________________ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?WITNESS: I forget..ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?____________________________________ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?WITNESS: He’s 20, much like your IQ.___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?WITNESS: Are you shitting me?_________________________________________ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?WITNESS: Getting laid____________________________________________ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: How many were boys?WITNESS: None.ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?____________________________________________ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?WITNESS: By death..ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?WITNESS: Take a guess.___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beardATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male._____________________________________ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.______________________________________ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight._________________________________________ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?WITNESS: Oral…_________________________________________ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PMATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?______________________________________And last:ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?WITNESS: No..ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Reblogging because there are some sassy little shits out there.

sk-raveness:

drucila616:

How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces?

These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
_______________________________
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.
_____________________________________
ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.
ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
WITNESS: Forty-five years.
_________________________________
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget..
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
___________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
____________________________________

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He’s 20, much like your IQ.
___________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitting me?
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Getting laid
____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death..
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.
___________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male.
_____________________________________
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral…
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?

______________________________________
And last:

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No..
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Reblogging because there are some sassy little shits out there.

(Source: pandaaamonium14, via thegirlwhosnotpossible)

15 4 / 2014

15 4 / 2014

foolish-wisdom:

foolish-wisdom:

ATTENTION EVERYONE:
this is one of my best friends from dance, Kierra. she is the most mature sixth graders I know. the only thing I don’t like about her is that she is convinced that she’s fat. I have tried so hard to convince her otherwise but nothing works. if you guys could reblog this if you think that she is perfect the way she is so I can show her how many people believe that she is not fat, that would be amazing

c’mon guys, I know how powerful you are on this website. it just takes one click. this girl isn’t even 13 yet

(via broken-and-bloody-wings)

15 4 / 2014

lookmomimfucked:

fuck-benedict-cumberbatch:

WHY DO TEENAGE GIRLS ALWAYS GO OUT IN ODD NUMBERED GROUPS

BECAUSE THEY CANT EVEN

(via fuck-benedict-cumberbatch)

15 4 / 2014

katyissuperawesome:

deathpoolquinn:

horrible-historian:

I JUST CHOKED ON MY OWN SALIVA
ahahahahaha

it makes it even funnier when you see that’s the Ultimate Spiderman’s Coulson
I mean…

Seriously…


seriously if you don’t already watch Ultimate Spiderman you musteven if it’s just for how ridiculous a fanboy Coulson isplus Coulson is actually voiced by Clark Gregg

katyissuperawesome:

deathpoolquinn:

horrible-historian:

I JUST CHOKED ON MY OWN SALIVA

ahahahahaha

it makes it even funnier when you see that’s the Ultimate Spiderman’s Coulson

I mean…

Seriously…

seriously if you don’t already watch Ultimate Spiderman you must

even if it’s just for how ridiculous a fanboy Coulson is

plus Coulson is actually voiced by Clark Gregg

(Source: scarfofcumbersaurus, via fuck-benedict-cumberbatch)

15 4 / 2014

optimisam:

  • saving people | hunting things
  • worrying about dean | worrying about john
  • having faith in dean | having faith in john
  • dean’s presence | john’s absense
  • not willing to let dean down | being let down by john

(via fuck-benedict-cumberbatch)

14 4 / 2014

marguerite26:

gunpowderandspark:

Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Now in Theaters and IMAX.

I haven’t seen the movie yet but if this isn’t how this scene goes I’m going to be pissed.

(via fuck-benedict-cumberbatch)